Normal Shopper? What is that? A disease?

5 Telltale Signs that you are A Normal Shopper

• ·         When you are browsing through the store and all of a sudden a certain item of clothing/footwear/millinery/whatever- the- hell- the- shop- is- selling jumps out at you and screams “PLEASE! Buy me. You and I were meant for each other. Make me yours. You have no idea how hard it is hanging on this mannequin/sitting on this rack waiting; knowing that you’re out there searching for me”. And you go “Yeah. Ok. Whatever.”
• ·         When you pick up a previously unimpressive article, stare at it for a long time or stare at yourself in the mirror holding the damn thing in front of you like armor, tilt your head and go “You know what? I think I am in love. You might be just the thing I have been looking for. I will make you mine.”And the said article(in your head) says “Yeah. Ok. Whatever”
• ·         When you walk into a store with a determined expression, your mouth set in a grim line and head straight for that rack and that hanger, expecting to find something that you thought would be there, knew would be there but find something utterly blindingly hideous instead. Fact is, you only hoped for said article to be present there.
• ·         When you look at something, pick it up and cradle it in your arms, breathe in its scent and hug it to your chest and know for certain that fate has united you two. This rosy picture lasts till your parent/chaperone/friend asks you to look at the price tag. You squelch that tendril of the “affordability” doubt in your head and confidently turn the price tag around and find yourself holding something possibly costlier than the Kohinoor diamond. You turn pale and wide eyed, shake your head like you have just found out that French fries are actually made of cowdung and put said article back to where it was before you happened to it. You walk away like a fallen warrior.
• ·         When you know you have done the right thing deep down into the very core of your heart and have left no stone unturned in your quest to make object of untold passion yours-you’ve found it, you’ve tried it on, you’ve double, no, triple checked the price tag and you are headed towards the cash counter; you squeal in delight and the sales assistants look happy and relieved and fulfilled at the same time-happy like they have just been gifted a month’s worth of Ferrero Rochers; relieved like they’ve just been told that they found the correct match for their blood transfusion and fulfilled like they have just found a cure to cancer.